Stretch Marks are the Devil.

And the devil has found me.

Well, technically I was never lost.

For those of you that are squeamish, now would be the point to stop reading - I have no shame of my stretch marks and will be describing them to you and their progression in great detail.




Well, the history of stretch marks began at the ripe old age of 16, otherwise known as puberty. I was a competitive gymnast, so this was a late onset, but still mind boggling all the same. Suddenly I had boobs, hips, and stretch marks on both locations. Small, little pink cracks, that quickly faded to a silvery white. Always being semi-aware of them while no one else would be, I reserved myself to boyshort bottom bikinis.

The first pregnancy stretch marks arrived at about 16 weeks. The silvery white lines left over from puberty now suddenly had pink tips to them. 2 on the left, 3 on the right - they were continuing to rip. Not long after, I noticed 2 pink tips on the right boob - sure enough, also ripping. That week, one on the left side had made a running leap up my hip, and was now a dark pink line about an inch and a half.

At this point, I had gained one pound.

I had already been getting nightly rubdowns by the husband, in an attempt to stave off such advances of the dreaded dark pink, and well, to be honest, it was getting difficult to whip around to attempt to view my hips. I just assumed the husband would be making me aware of any new developments.

Until yesterday.

After getting our of a particularly hot shower, I was feeling super tight and dry - like, wanting-to-claw-my-skin-off-itchy tight and dry - no more blindly applying lotion. It was time to check things out.

OH MY GOD THE HORROR I SAW!

They have progressed. They have started to wrap onto my back - it looks like I was attacked by a wildebeast with some nasty claws where there were once tiny pink caps, only to be replaced by a new and more plentiful multitude of pink dots, which now have me convinced I am turning into a leopard.

Well, I did gain 7 pounds last month. That could be considered alot for the body to handle at once. Not to mention, according to my latest belly picture, I had quite the re-popping. Looks like I am going to have a big boy! I am thinking I will run out of room before 40 weeks....

See what I mean? How will this continue for over 16 weeks? :D

All the hard work paid off!

All the stressing about calories paid off - I gained 7 pounds this month!

I made up for lost time. My midwife, Cheri, was proud :D She told me it was about time! They like to see a jump in weight right around 20 weeks, since that is when the spawn usually has a big growth jump.

As for the little man, he is perfect! The official ultrasound results, all of the measurements were right on target, nothing to worry about (the hip thing can't be diagnosed yet). Well, except one thing. His head is in the 80th percentile.

:::gulp:::

Other than that, I am measuring 2 weeks ahead in fundal height (24 weeks). I'd been reading my weekly emails, the one said about fundal height being equal to my belly button at 20 weeks, so I didn't think anything of it when I felt things real high, just figured it was gas. Nope... it was him. Cole just likes to hang out low most of the time, so even though the feeling is rare, it's him. Maybe he's just lost - his father's sense of direction. :D

I've hit that point in pregnancy where I can watch him kick me. This kid wants to play soccer apparently! He has quite the force behind those legs - which I do not appreciate at 3 am on my cervix. You can not come out yet little man! Stop trying to kick the door open! :D